My situation was similar in 2014: restaurant job whilst working towards my Bachelor’s in HR. In the summer’s I would do online, community college coursework. I didn’t have a family, major responsibilities, or a challenging job. Later, when I would start to take on more responsibilities, I would be grateful that I used my time this way.
This situation allowed me to continue with the relentless noting of my experience. I was too impatient to do sitting meditation, but would note for at least 3 hours of every day. My average was probably closer to 6.
Outside of noting, I would do tons of obsessive investigation, trying to combine my insights from Vipassana with the law-of-attraction practices I had learned from the Mental Science tradition. This mode of combining philosophical investigation with the somatic-energetic experience of the Insight Knowledges would serve me well through to reaching Technical 4th Path in late 2015.
Although I did not regularly journal during this period, I remember a tedious period of attempting to reach the A&P through the winter. When I finally did, it was not nearly as dramatic as my first experience of it at the Amma retreat.
In contrast, when I got into the 5th Nana for the first time, it was very dramatic. I started to feel horrifically anxious at work, and asked to leave early. My entire sensory field was dissolving like descending pixels on a computer screen. Driving home, I got a flat tire on the highway (and my cell phone had died, and it was pitch black outside) and had to change using my shitty car jack. I took this as a message from the Universe: Welcome to the dark night, bitch.
This lasted for around 4 months. Because my baseline was already one of irritation and anxiety (Bipolar symptoms), I don’t know that the Dukkha Nanas were that much different from my mixed states. Obviously, I do remember reaching each Insight Knowledge as a cutting edge: particularly Fear, Misery, Disgust and Reobservation. They all panned out exactly as their labels described.
The first time I popped into Low EQ from ReObs, I had ironically taken a break from the noting technique. I was working at the restaurant when I had the thought that I should start noting again. With this came a sensation best compared to some Kool-Aid or Jolly Rancher commercial in which a psychedelic wall of color invades a person’s normal sensory reality. It felt like a bubble popped in some other dimension. I immediately knew I had finally broken through.
If I remember correctly, that was in July, and I practiced constant, daily noting from then until November, when I decided to get in touch with Ron Crouch. Ron didn’t believe I was getting into the 11th Nana, without a teacher and any formal practice regimen. In our second session, I noted aloud for him for 45 minutes. At the end he said “Woah - You are getting into Equanimity!” He proceeded to blow my mind with a sophisticated explanation of how the sit progressed. Up until that point, I had a fairly primitive, macro-level understanding of how cycling occurs.
While many people are against scripting or self-dharma diagnosis, I found the perspective and information I got from Ron to be incredibly empowering. Suddenly I began to understand how fractalized all the sub-stages of the Equanimity Nana are, and how to get through them with the proper adjustments of technique. Towards the end of December, I was in High Equanimity.
This situation allowed me to continue with the relentless noting of my experience. I was too impatient to do sitting meditation, but would note for at least 3 hours of every day. My average was probably closer to 6.
Outside of noting, I would do tons of obsessive investigation, trying to combine my insights from Vipassana with the law-of-attraction practices I had learned from the Mental Science tradition. This mode of combining philosophical investigation with the somatic-energetic experience of the Insight Knowledges would serve me well through to reaching Technical 4th Path in late 2015.
Although I did not regularly journal during this period, I remember a tedious period of attempting to reach the A&P through the winter. When I finally did, it was not nearly as dramatic as my first experience of it at the Amma retreat.
In contrast, when I got into the 5th Nana for the first time, it was very dramatic. I started to feel horrifically anxious at work, and asked to leave early. My entire sensory field was dissolving like descending pixels on a computer screen. Driving home, I got a flat tire on the highway (and my cell phone had died, and it was pitch black outside) and had to change using my shitty car jack. I took this as a message from the Universe: Welcome to the dark night, bitch.
This lasted for around 4 months. Because my baseline was already one of irritation and anxiety (Bipolar symptoms), I don’t know that the Dukkha Nanas were that much different from my mixed states. Obviously, I do remember reaching each Insight Knowledge as a cutting edge: particularly Fear, Misery, Disgust and Reobservation. They all panned out exactly as their labels described.
The first time I popped into Low EQ from ReObs, I had ironically taken a break from the noting technique. I was working at the restaurant when I had the thought that I should start noting again. With this came a sensation best compared to some Kool-Aid or Jolly Rancher commercial in which a psychedelic wall of color invades a person’s normal sensory reality. It felt like a bubble popped in some other dimension. I immediately knew I had finally broken through.
If I remember correctly, that was in July, and I practiced constant, daily noting from then until November, when I decided to get in touch with Ron Crouch. Ron didn’t believe I was getting into the 11th Nana, without a teacher and any formal practice regimen. In our second session, I noted aloud for him for 45 minutes. At the end he said “Woah - You are getting into Equanimity!” He proceeded to blow my mind with a sophisticated explanation of how the sit progressed. Up until that point, I had a fairly primitive, macro-level understanding of how cycling occurs.
While many people are against scripting or self-dharma diagnosis, I found the perspective and information I got from Ron to be incredibly empowering. Suddenly I began to understand how fractalized all the sub-stages of the Equanimity Nana are, and how to get through them with the proper adjustments of technique. Towards the end of December, I was in High Equanimity.
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