At the beginning of April, I was doing two formal, 30 minute sits daily (still a couch yogi). I was able to focus on my breath much of the time without needing to gladden the mind. Off-cushion practice heavily emphasized the Supramundane investigation of the ‘bottomless pit’ inside all humans, and the delusional attempts I make to fill it. These queries bolstered my confidence in Piti accumulation: something I can really count on. Mid-month I felt a similar confidence increase with regards to self-control and my ability to act with discipline.
I had a five day ‘preview’ of a new sensory baseline that would not stabilize for another four months. Although it didn’t last, the luminosity and spaciousness were thrilling.
Throughout the month, I moved my twice daily sits from the couch to a recently purchased zafu and zabuton. I gradually lengthened them from 30 minutes, to 45 minutes, to 60. I took a lot pride in my newfound ability to practice sitting meditation, as I had always felt that my brand of off-cushion practice was somehow inferior. As my breath-focus became more reliable, I was able to add in “watch the stillness/flow” concurrent with the sensations of the breath (on & off cushion).
I started thinking of habit formation in a more systematic way, creating lists of my goals. I learned to adapt to waves of agitation at my unpaid internship by taking short breaks between work periods. However, more pervasive blockages (such as lust and obsessing) can not be broken on the external/behavioral level. Instead, the inputs need to be cut off. I began to do this by averting my eyes from attractive women on the street, and practicing the techniques outlined in the “Removal of Distracting Thoughts Sutta.”
I had a five day ‘preview’ of a new sensory baseline that would not stabilize for another four months. Although it didn’t last, the luminosity and spaciousness were thrilling.
Throughout the month, I moved my twice daily sits from the couch to a recently purchased zafu and zabuton. I gradually lengthened them from 30 minutes, to 45 minutes, to 60. I took a lot pride in my newfound ability to practice sitting meditation, as I had always felt that my brand of off-cushion practice was somehow inferior. As my breath-focus became more reliable, I was able to add in “watch the stillness/flow” concurrent with the sensations of the breath (on & off cushion).
I started thinking of habit formation in a more systematic way, creating lists of my goals. I learned to adapt to waves of agitation at my unpaid internship by taking short breaks between work periods. However, more pervasive blockages (such as lust and obsessing) can not be broken on the external/behavioral level. Instead, the inputs need to be cut off. I began to do this by averting my eyes from attractive women on the street, and practicing the techniques outlined in the “Removal of Distracting Thoughts Sutta.”
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