I continued with the same regular habits from last month, for most of this one. I took a break from the nootropic for 3 weeks & noticed that it’s positive effects have remained. The increasing automaticity & reduction of suffering has continued. I am finding that my preferences are switching from unhealthy to healthy, unskillful to skillful: broccoli is the new ice cream, exercise is the new netflix, cleanliness is the new indulgence, etc. My insecurity around partnership took a big hit when my friend introduced me to the idea of non-monogamy, defined by an absence of rules, expectations & structures, rather than a presence of some “alternative lifestyle” or special identity. I am in the process of investigating how this can be carried out in a way that optimizes connection with others & my own 8fold path. It feels like a huge weight dropped from my shoulders when I understood that my obstacle here may no longer be some narcissistic woun...
At the intersection of deep meditation, growing up, and mood disorder.