At the beginning of April, I was doing two formal, 30 minute sits daily (still a couch yogi). I was able to focus on my breath much of the time without needing to gladden the mind. Off-cushion practice heavily emphasized the Supramundane investigation of the ‘bottomless pit’ inside all humans, and the delusional attempts I make to fill it. These queries bolstered my confidence in Piti accumulation: something I can really count on. Mid-month I felt a similar confidence increase with regards to self-control and my ability to act with discipline. I had a five day ‘preview’ of a new sensory baseline that would not stabilize for another four months. Although it didn’t last, the luminosity and spaciousness were thrilling. Throughout the month, I moved my twice daily sits from the couch to a recently purchased zafu and zabuton. I gradually lengthened them from 30 minutes, to 45 minutes, to 60. I took a lot pride in my newfound ability ...
At the intersection of deep meditation, growing up, and mood disorder.