In May, my relative insight from April around relationships & communication deepened. There were more epiphanies about ownership of my identity & desires. I explored some perfect-parent type practices with other friend & family figures to help round out some of these insights. I contemplated the “agent-arena match”: how one must present a different self depending on the situation in life. I also mused about the shortcomings of individualist culture & how total well-being can be deepened by harkening back to the hunter-gatherer roots of humanity. This line of inquiry led me back to Integral-type writing for the first time in a while & I thought about how the ideal future civilization would be able to combine technological advance with basic collectivist values & connectivity. I met with my spiritual friend who gave my practice the stamp of approval. To my surprise, they encouraged my “no emotions” line of inquiry from April, fra...
At the intersection of deep meditation, growing up, and mood disorder.