In January, I increased a supplement called UBQH, which had multiple very positive effects. Specifically, I had an increase in outgoingness at work; a sudden inspiration to restart skateboarding (which I tried but didn’t continue with); some more insights similar to last month about reason vs emotions; the beginnings of a change in my relationship to hunger & libido that would continue to evolve over the next few months. I must have had some CoQ10 deficit for years that was strongly contributing to my mood symptoms, which is now being addressed. I continued to practice TMI, sitting for several hours a day in many cases. I stayed in stage 4, with more previews of 5 & 6 occasionally. I continued to notice that my off cushion life was improving greatly even though I did not seem to be improving at calm abiding that much. I contemplated & worked with different types of dullness & distraction a lot. I started attending a tr...
At the intersection of deep meditation, growing up, and mood disorder.