This month, I struggled to balance the tension of effort with the release of letting go. I talked to Shargrol, who recommended that I be more like a “loose racecar,” as in Formula One, where they have to balance control with speed. I also spoke with Richard, who said that I’m probably experiencing a psychological driver, ala the Transactional Analysis school of psychology: something below the surface personality but above the animal instinct level. These pointers helped me recognize the need for balance.
I moved to a new house in a nicer neighborhood and started working for a large company in a job that is very fast paced and challenging. I’ve earned praise from my manager for my hard work at this job, which I definitely would not have been able to do without the adjustments I’ve made to my mind over the past few years. However, I am not able to do any off-cushion joy or mindfulness because of the high level of focus required. Also my life improvements had to be paused to make ‘space’ for the job, although I’ve continued them when I could. Nothing major happened on the sensory-perceptual level: just a couple A&P’s that I didn’t buy into.
Comments
Post a Comment